(Drowning) In The Love
by DTBSpecialist
Summary: Gaara had one friend as a child, one dependence, one weakness, one need. Sarang. But things weren't as smooth within her family as she made it sound so when she disappeared after her brother found her hanging around Gaara it came as no surprise, but when she came back to the Land of Wind with a ring on it, it was utterly devastating. [OCxGaara]
1. Backstreets & Alleys

(Drowning) In The "Love"

Chapter One: Backstreets & Alleys

Warning: Some content may not be suitable for young readers.

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><p>Back when things were rocky there was no one- even the ones closest to Gaara had been offed. Some by themselves, some by others, but for the most part they were never really there. Sometimes Gaara thought it would be better to have an imaginary friend than to be all alone on his own, but he began thinking even a figure of his imagination would be disgraced to be a part of him.<p>

That was until he touched a shining light in the midst of Darknesses grasp.

Gaara saw her for the first time on one of the backstreets of the Hidden Sand. She popped out of a dark alley in front of the red-haired boy. Bright blue eyes, dark blonde hair, honey colored skin and a confused expression. Her small hands were fisted in the back of her yellow sundress as she eyes Gaara curiously.

"What're you doing here all alone?" She asked him innocently. Gaara tossed around the idea of killing her, but for some reason something in the way she smiled at him- he didn't know what it was- caught him so off guard. It made a certain feeling bubble inside him that he wasn't used to and it scared him. The girl made her way over to Gaara and plopped down next to him, not caring that she was getting her expensive looking clothing dirty. "Well?" She nudged him with her small shoulder.

"I'm not doing anything." Gaara replied finally.

"Then why're you sitting here?"

"Because… I don't have anything else to do. Why're _you_ here?" The girl giggled.

"Cause I can be!" She said enthusiastically, but then waved off her reply. "Just kidding, I _was_ looking for Kazehana- my sister- but I couldn't find her so I just decided to go walking around." Gaara was familiar with the name Kazehana, she was a local prodigy residing in the Hidden Sand and belonged to the Hachimitsu clan.

"You're Kazehana's sister?" Gaara scoffed and turned away. "Not possible." The girl furrowed her eyebrows at Gaara.

"And why isn't it possible?" She pressed.

"Because… Kazehana doesn't have time to be looking after a little sister." The girl crossed her arms across her puffed out chest and pouted.

"That's why she doesn't! I can take care of myself." She grumbled, opening one eye to look at Gaara. "I'm Sarang Hachimitsu of the Hachimitsu clan residing in the Land of Lightning. Nice to meet you Gaara of the Desert." Gaara wasn't shocked to know she knew who he was, but he didn't know she was from the Land of Lightning.

"How do you know me if you're from the Land of Lightning." Sarang blushed and began playing with her fingers.

"Well… mom and dad made me stay behind with grandma and grandpa there while they moved here. I come to visit them every once in a while, but Kazehana ends up being the one to provide me with basic necessities most of the time. But I still take care of myself!" She added the last bit quickly making Gaara shake his head.

"If you know who I am then why are you sitting with me? Talking to me as if we're old friends?" Sarang smiled and pulled her knees up to her chest, wrapping her arms around them.

"Because, maybe one day we will be. I don't discriminate against the outcasts, in fact I think that everyone deserves a chance and Kazehana is always telling me about how lonely you seem."

"I don't need the pity of others." Gaara said, standing.

"It's not pity!" Sarang shouted standing with Gaara and tugging his sleeve. The boy's eyes widened in shock but when he looked at Sarang her eyes were pointed downward at the ground. "It's… an offer."

"An offer?" Sarang held out her pinky.

"To be friends; comrades." Gaara stared at her pinky for what seemed like hours until he finally shook his head and began to walk off.

"I don't need friends or comrades." He stated.

"Some choose to live in solitude, but no one can withstand the pain of it all, so I know you need friends- at least one!" Gaara turned and grabbed her small wrist, angered.

"Why are you so stubborn?" Tears pinpricked Sarang's blue eyes.

"Because I don't want you to be sad and alone anymore." Her voice was barely a whisper, but Gaara could hear how she was pleading, so, reluctantly, he wrapped his pinky around hers.

"Fine, but don't get in my way." Sarang visibly brightened as she nodded. She followed behind Gaara as he walked off the back street and into the back alley where she'd come from. He could only imagine how angry her parents would be with her for hanging around him since they were such a prideful family.

"Hey Gaara?" Sarang said behind him.

"What?"

"Where are we going?" Gaara shrugged.

"I don't know, wherever our feet take us."

"Okay." The two walked in comfortable silence for a hours until night had come. Gaara had places to be and hopefully Sarang did too. The red-haired boy turned suddenly to face her causing her to bump into him. When she looked back up at Gaara she smiled, wide and toothy.

"Isn't it time for you to go home now?" Gaara asked and Sarang tapped a finger on her cheek.

"Probably, but I don't know how to get home." Gaara sighed and plopped down on the ground. Sarang went after him.

"How do you not know how to get home?" He asked, astounded.

"I dunno, I just… don't pay attention to the details." Gaara considered leaving the girl on her own, but with how small and frail she was Gaara knew that some creep would inevitably try to take advantage of her and she would most likely fall for it. So, Gaara stayed with her and they talked for a bit and after a while they faded into silence. Sarang would hum songs occasionally and Gaara would listen but that was about it.

"I don't know!" Said an angered voice. "She just… ran off!" Sarang's eyes widened and she jumped up, pushing Gaara.

"What are you doing?" He shouted.

"Shh!" Sarang said as if Gaara had done something wrong. "Hide!" Her order was just a bit too late as Gaara saw Kazehana round the corner with a man who must've been the girls' father.

"Sarang!" He shouted. Sarang's hands flew to each other and she began fiddling with her fingers. "What do you think you're doing?" As the man edged closer Gaara noticed Kazehana turn away from the scene.

"I...I was just… playing with… Gaara." Sarang's father grabbed her arm and drug her along not bothering to loosen his grip on her tiny arm. "Ouch!" Gaara wanted to intervene, but he didn't know what to do. Killing a member of their family wasn't easy, nor was it to go without consequence.

"Get used to it because when you're mother gets ahold of you…" The man shook his head and tossed Sarang to her sister. She grabbed onto her elder sister's light brown hair as she began crying.

"Dad, she's not a ragdoll, you can't just throw her around." Gaara could only watch and listen as the man made his way down the path, Sarang in his hand once more and Kazehana following, but still too visibly afraid to get close. Soon enough their voices faded but not before Gaara heard an audible '_slap_' ring out into the night.

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><p>The sun beat down on Gaara's head as he lied down on the sandy alley he'd found. It was cooler in the slight shade of the alley, but not by much since the sand was hotter than the sun's rays. Gaara tossed and turned in the sand trying to find a comfortable sleeping position, but he just couldn't. The night before he'd tried his best to go to sleep, but the thought of Sarang being hurt kept invading his memory. She was so different from villagers of the Sand- so loud and carefree… so clueless and defiant. She was typically the kind of girl that sneaky men would take advantage of. Men who dated for sport or who wanted money or something… else.<p>

'_If only she weren't so reckless-'_

"I knew you'd be here." A familiar voice said. Gaara shot up and seen blonde hair turned golden against the sun's beams and perfect blue eyes. Sarang was wearing a yellow skirt and a long sleeved white shirt which confused Gaara. She slipped into the alley and sat down next to Gaara, pulling something out of the front pocket on her shirt. She handed Gaara a piece of bread and gave him a wide smile as he eyed it.

"What?" He asked. Sarang shook her head with a sigh.

"Take it dummy." She said. "I got some from my parent's house for you and I. You look kind of thin." Gaara scoffed and took the bread.

"You're the same size as me." But it was true, Gaara was hungry and he would do anything to avoid stealing food from the venders on the street. They always seemed to catch him in the act and that only caused more trouble.

"But I'm a _girl_." Sarang wasn't going to let herself be wrong in the argument. The two of them ate in silence, but as Sarang was lifting up her arm it snagged on one of the twigs lying in the sand and ripped the sleeve of her shirt. The two of them stared at the bruised and cut flesh of Sarang's arm. Gaara wanted to rip Sarang's father to bits, to do that to such an innocent girl… why? Why was the world-such a beautiful place- filled with so many ugly people? Gaara's eyes met the pleading ones of Sarang's and knew immediately the last thing she wanted was a question. Or a questioning look. And so, Gaara turned his head and looked upward at the darkening sky. "I didn't cry…" She whispered, looking away from Gaara.

"I didn't ask." He replied.

"But I wanted you to know, I didn't cry. I don't cry unless I'm in a lot of pain. The only reason I was crying when dad found me was because he was hurting my wrist, it's sprained now." Gaara smiled for the first time in a long time.

"Unless you're in a lot of pain, huh?" Sarang nodded. "That's strange, I used to cry a lot, but for different reasons."

"Don't cry anymore Gaara." Sarang said suddenly and desperately. "Don't cry! No more!" She slapped her hands to either side of Gaara's face and squeezed his cheeks with a wild look in her eyes.

"Hey!" Gaara gasped as Sarang lifted him closer to her face.

"Promise me." She demanded. "Promise me you won't cry anymore. At least not when I'm with you." Gaara nodded as much as he could and Sarang relaxed, dropping her hands and lying down. She rested her head on Gaara's lap and looked up at the few stars in the sky and pointed to two, side by side. "Hey Gaara," Gaara looked down at her and raised an eyebrow. "See those two stars right there?"

"What of them?" They were just stars, weren't they?

"That's gonna be us when we die. We're gonna die together, so when I'm gone don't go off and get yourself killed, okay? I promise you that next time I come back I'll come back strong so that I can keep us safe. I'll make sure I stay next time so that we won't have to be apart from each other." So many thoughts ran through Gaara's head.

_'Why is she saying all this? She can't be a lonely girl, her siblings are popular all around school and I know she's not an outcast. She's defying the rules of the Universe. Survival of the fittest, which I am not, so why does she, who's fit, want to keep me, a mistake, safe?'_

"I won't need someone to keep me safe." Gaara said.

"But you'll need someone to keep you company and I can do that too. I'll become the baddest female you've ever met Gaara and I'll be able to keep everyone I love safe. I'll be on top of everyone else in the Land of Lightning. I'll be the next Raikage!" Sarang smiled as if she were having the sweetest dream ever. "And you can be the Kazekage and we can definitely be friends forever then."

"Then you better get really strong Sarang. And you better not fall to anyone, don't let me beat you when you get back." Sarang laughed.

"Not a chance Fireball."

"Excuse me?"

"Fireball, cause your hair's red." Gaara shook his head.

"You have no shame."

"I should probably be going now before dad comes looking for me with momma instead of Kazehana. I guess I'll see you tomorrow- don't tell anyone I was with you if they ask. I don't want Mifune finding out and telling momma and dad. They'll hit me again."

"Be careful going home."

"I will."

And the secret meeting went on for weeks. Sarang would meet with Gaara sometime during the evening and the two would talk about whatever came to mind. Sarang would tell Gaara about her four siblings and how irritating they were- and Gaara noticed how much stronger she was getting as the day's passed. Each time they seen each other Sarang seemed as if she were more fierce than the time before.

About a month later she ended up cutting most of her hair off leaving her with a stylish pixie cut. She told Gaara how she was to be the next Head of Clan since Kazehana wasn't interested in it and Mifune was in the ANBU and had no time for family activity let alone leading the clan and so that left Sarang who gladly accepted the role.

"You must be spending more time outside," Gaara told her. "You're getting darker."

"I am." Sarang's eyes widened. "Maybe I won't be the outcast of village now! Well, actually my whole family is lighter than everyone else in the village… but it's because we don't spend much time outside or in the honeyfields."

"I'm sure you don't, your family is important in the ninja world so I'm guessing they don't have much time to be out in the fields." Sarang shrugged.

"Sometimes I wish I could be out there more, I mean, it's not like I have anything else to do. I don't wanna watch granny work all day." Gaara wanted to laugh at the girl's crude attitude.

"The only reason she wants you to watch her is so that you'll have at least a hint of a clue as to what you're doing when you take her place." Sarang sighed and shook her head.

"It's still boring." Gaara didn't reply since he knew it would be a waste of time and effort. Sarang wasn't one to be wrong- even if she _was_ wrong. Then again, Gaara also hadn't lived through watching his grandmother sign papers and dutifully attend to their clan's needs, so he had no personal experience on the situation.

"What are you doing, Sarang?" Gaara and Sarang turned in unison to see a tall figure behind them. Gaara heard the breath leave his friend's lips. "Dad's going to be so mad when he finds out you've been hanging around Gaara again." There was a tall boy standing there, smirking, as he toyed with his brown hair.

"M-Mifune… I thought you had… training today?" Mifune nodded and laughed.

"I did, but I finished early and Sensei was kind enough to let me go home. I told him I had to walk you home and I didn't find you where I told you to stay so I assumed you would be here with this freak." Sarang's face turned bright red but not in embarrassment.

"He's not the freak if you're the one prying in my personal life enough to know where I'm sneaking off to!" She shouted. Mifune's smirk fell and he cut his eyes at his younger sister. They really did look alike.

"You little ass… mom's gonna wipe the floor with you when you get home." Gaara knew Sarang was trying to stay strong in front of him. Mifune turned with a disgusted grunted and began walking off. "Say goodbye to that demon child, we're leaving." Gaara could feel himself getting angry, but right as he was about to fly off the handle he felt two arms wrap around his neck.

"Bye Gaara." Sarang said sadly. "I swear I'll see you again someday." She pecked his cheek lightly with her lips and stowed off after Mifune.

"And you kissed him you nasty little thing." Gaara heard the eldest say as he walked off with his sister. Sarang said nothing, but instead hung her head and folded her hands in front of her. Gaara's cheek was warm where she had kissed him and he longed for her soft touch once more, but he knew those days were long gone.

Everything in moderation, right?


	2. Insecurities

(Drowning) In The "Love"

Chapter Two: Insecurities

Warning: Some content may not be suitable for young readers.

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><p><span><em>Three Years Later<em>

Being the Kazekage was some serious business, Gaara was no longer allowed time to reminisce about old times. He was no longer allowed to make everything a pity party for himself, and he also didn't really have a reason to. After becoming Kazekage he wasn't looked down on by the villagers, things were… good. Still, in the back of his mind he couldn't help but owe it all to that _one_ friend from years ago. Without her support Gaara was sure he would've been dead or locked away.

As Gaara looked outside he couldn't help but acknowledge how pretty the day was. The sky was bright and blue with white wisps of clouds passing slowly by, the sun peaked through them just a little creating a lovely shadow over the village but still balanced with the bright sunrays.

'_Surely I can leave for a few moments.' _Gaara thought to himself, standing. There couldn't be any harm in leaving his post for a while, besides Temari and Kankuro were sure to keep the place safe. Without much more thought about it Gaara found his way outside. The kids playing on the streets stopped and stared as Gaara walked by seemingly stoic. Inside Gaara was glad to see the young ones were having a good time. Their parents bowed politely as he walked by and Gaara would nod back to them.

The further down the street he went the more concentrated the people were. Gaara noticed that there was a thick crowd of whispering people- women, children, men, elders. Everyone was there and talking. That's when Gaara heard it.

"That can't be! How does she run the Hachimitsu clan _and_ retain her position as a member of the ANBU?" A woman gasped.

"I don't know, but I know I never pegged Sarang to be the one to turn out so well off. I used to swear up and down she was going to have a hard time on her own out in the world." A man spoke up. Gaara felt the adrenaline begin to course through his veins at the name Sarang. There was no way- why would she be back in the village? The Kazekage started off slowly pushing past people in the crowd until they were parting for him.

Perfect blue eyes met green ones and a smile as bright as the sun above lit up Gaara's memory.

Sarang let out a happy screech and rushed Gaara. Her arms wrapped tightly around her old friend's frame and she squeezed. Gaara felt the air leaving his lungs but didn't care. Instead he wrapped his own arms around Sarang, an uncharacteristic show of affection.

"Gaara!" She shouted. Her arms, tightly around Gaara's neck, fidgeted with some of his red hair. "Fireball…" She whispered with a small laugh. Sarang took a step back to get a good look at the still-in-shock Gaara.

"Ah, I forgot the Lord Kazekage was friends with the Lady of the Hachimitsu clan when he was young!" One of the elders in the surrounding crowd said. Sarang's eyes widened and her jaw dropped.

"_K-Kazekage_?" She stammered. Gaara nodded.

"Yes, I have become the Kazekage."

"Oh wow milady, you're an honorary member of the Hidden Cloud and you didn't know who the current Kazekage was?" A man appeared behind Sarang, lovingly enclosing his arms around her from behind, encasing her in a hug. He kissed the side of Sarang's cheek and she smiled- Gaara felt sick.

"_Sorry_," Sarang whined. "I just… didn't study like I was supposed to." Gaara cleared his throat and the young man backed away from Sarang and bowed.

"It's nice to meet you Lord Kazekage Gaara. I've heard my fiancee speak many great things about you from the time you were both children." Sarang blushed slightly while Gaara felt the blood leave his face. They were… engaged?

'_What? Did you think she was going to save herself for you? You've both grown… she's grown into a beautiful young woman fit for marriage.' _Gaara spoke in his mind, but he couldn't deny the crawling, scratching feeling of betrayal and hurt bubbling up.

"That's nice to hear." Gaara replied. All traces of happiness had strayed from Gaara's face leaving him ill-mannered and cold. "I see you're now engaged Lady Sarang?" The young woman looked shocked to hear Gaara call her Lady Sarang instead of just Sarang. She folded her hands in front of her and looked down at the sandy ground.

"Y-Yes… I guess I should introduce him." She said pointedly. "This is Minho Kamitsu of the Kamitsu clan, he's to be my future husband." Gaara nodded.

"It's nice to meet you."

"Hey! Is that… Sarang?" Sarang smiled at the all-too-familiar voice of Temari's. She waved to the blonde haired teen.

"It is, it is." She replied. "Long time no see Temari." Temari sighed placing her hands on her hips.

"Tell me about it!" Temari looked Sarang up and down. "Now, tell me where you got this bangin' body from? I remember when you were nothing but a stick figure." Sarang laughed lightheartedly and shook her head.

"Training?" She offered. The two old friends laughed.

"Are you coming to stay?" Temari asked.

"For a while. I came to see my parents and siblings, are you, Gaara, and Kankuro going to be free at all for the next few weeks?" Temari looked at Gaara.

"... _They_ should be, but I have important business to tend to." The last thing Gaara wanted to do was spend the next few weeks with Sarang and her 'fiancee'. Her expression changed and Gaara saw something flash behind her eyes but it was too quickly gone for the Kazekage to register what it was.

"Oh, that's too bad. I was thinking that maybe we could all go out to get something to eat. Or maybe you three could come over and mother could cook something for us?" Temari grinned.

"I like that idea. I've never got to try your mother's cooking, but everyone in the village used to go around saying it was phenomenal." Sarang laughed.

"Eh, it's… decent." The two females laughed and Gaara watched Minho carefully. The way he eyes Temari and not his fiancee, the way he glared at Sarang… it wasn't quite right. Minho's eyes met Gaara's and the red-head cut his eyes at the brunette. Minho ran a few fingers down Sarang's side as she was speaking with Temari, making sure to smirk at Gaara as he did so. Sarang laughed and turned her head to look Minho in the eyes. "What?" She whispered not quietly enough.

"Nothing, I just wanted to say I love you." Minho's voice showed no sign of treachery or sneakiness, but it was overcoated with sweetness. Gaara could see how Sarang's paling skin prickled under her fiancee's touch, but she still smiled. Then Gaara thought, she _had_ gotten much paler over the two years they'd been separated.

'_She must be hard at work signing papers.'_ Her hair had gotten a paler blonde and her eyes seemed… tired. She definitely wasn't the same energetic kid she used to be. Minho nuzzled his nose into Sarang's hair, messing up her hair and she pushed him away playfully. Gaara turned swiftly and began to retreat back to his office.

"It was nice seeing you again Sarang." Gaara said.

"Y-You should come by the office sometime!" Temari piped up. "I'm sure Kankuro would love to see you again. Maybe… tomorrow! That's perfect, we're all having a big dinner so make sure you're there. And bring your fiancee with you if you want." Gaara felt annoyed at the fact that Temari was making arrangements without him.

"Great! I'll be there." Sarang said.

"As will I. Thank you for the humble invite, I'll see you tomorrow Lord Kazekage."

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><p>Temari huffed, blowing a piece of hair from her eyes. Gaara had tried ignoring her incessant attitude since they'd first gotten back to the office, but it was becoming increasingly harder with each huff and puff that came from Temari's mouth. Then she did it again. Gaara slammed his pen down.<p>

"Is there something bothering you Temari?" Gaara rumbled.

"Oh, nothing." Temari hummed.

"...You two seem… tense." Kankuro said.

"That's the feeling I got, but I'm not sure what exactly I've done."

"Ugh, you _know_ what you did! You gave Sarang, your childhood friend, the cold shoulder. Gaara, I could see it in her eyes that you hurt her. She wasn't even here for more than ten minutes! She probably thinks you're the biggest asshole in the village now." Gaara scoffed and faced Temari.

"And that's her business because?" Temari rolled her eyes and Kankuro held out a hand.

"Wait, Sarang's back?" Temari and Gaara nodded.

"And she's coming over for dinner tomorrow with her fiancee so everyone needs to be nice and polite, understand?"

"I don't see why it was your place to invite her to dinner tomorrow. What if I didn't want her and her deadbeat fiancee coming to my home and eating with me?" Temari was taken aback by Gaara's underhanded comment.

"Gaara!" She gasped. "What is _wrong_ with you?" Temari shook her head and crossed her arms. "I just… I don't understand and you know what? I don't even want to at this point. She's coming over tomorrow with her deadbeat fiancee. Deal with it _Lord Kazekage_." Temari laughed a humorless laugh and exited the room. Kankuro stood there blinking and sighed.

"What?" Gaara said shooting him a deathly glare.

"...I'm gonna take a shot in the dark, but you don't want her fiancee here, do you?" Gaara shook his head and got back to working on the papers he had been signing before Temari's outburst.

"I don't care who comes and who doesn't, I just hope Temari doesn't expect the most pleasant side of me."

'_Why am I so jealous?'_

"Gaara, it's okay to feel… double-crossed."

_'She's capable of making her own decisions, she's a young woman now.'_

"I don't feel double-crossed." Gaara replied. "I don't have any reason to."

_'I'm a bad liar.'_

"Well, judging by how into her you were when we were young… now that she had a fiancee you must feel… some way."

_'I do.'_

"I don't want to talk about it, there's nothing to talk about."

'_Why would she do this to me? What does he have that I don't?' _

"Fine…" Kankuro graciously finished the conversation and left Gaara to attend to his work.

'_Maybe double-crossed isn't such a bad word to use.'_


	3. XX

(Drowning) In The "Love"

Chapter Three: XX

Warning: Some content may not be suitable for young readers.

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><p><span><em>The Next Evening <em>

The next evening everyone was scrambling around to get ready for the honorary guest. Temari was wearing a nice blue kimono that hung loosely on her figure. Kankuro was dressed as his usual self, just a bit more fixed up, and Gaara the same. The food that was being prepared in the kitchen smelled delightful. Just as Gaara was about to get up to see how everything was turning out there was a knock on the door. Temari rushed to get it but not before turning and shooting a glare Gaara's way. Her eyes were telling him to be good.

"Ah, Sarang, Minho! Come in, come in, the food is almost done." Gaara groaned inwardly and rolled his eyes. Temari and Sarang came inside giggling and gossiping before even being able to sit down. The two females sat down together in perfect sync and after the came in the snake in human's skin.

_'The new Orochimaru?'_ Gaara wanted to laugh, but he didn't need to arouse suspicion- especially not with Temari in the room. Gaara felt a slight twinge of electricity run through his body making the thin hairs on his arm raise as Sarang scooted over next to Gaara. He looked at her and she smiled. Gaara nodded, but the slowly appearing smile he bore quickly dissipated as he seen the two enclosed hands of Sarang and Minho under the table. Gaara turned his head away, but not before seeing the small glint of hope in Sarang's eyes flee.

"Sarang!" Kankuro shouted happily. "It's been so long since I've seen you. You… grew. A lot." Sarang laughed and nodded.

"Yes, I mean, it _has_ been three years you know." She replied playfully. It wasn't long before the food came out, served by the of the best cooks Gaara had in the Kazekage's building where he resided. Perfectly handled and made sushi along with bowls upon bowls of ramen cooked just the way Sarang liked it (per Gaara's request), tofu, miso, rice, Gaar made sure that, despite not being keen on the whole thing, Sarang was served her favorite foods. While she wasn't looking the Kazekage couldn't help but glance at her and was pleasantly surprised with her gleeful expression.

The room was filled with lighthearted chatter and loud laughing and the occasional giggle shared by Temari and Sarang. It wasn't until Minho started sneaking peaks at the pretty servers coming in was there a bit of awkwardness to the air. Gaara knew he wasn't the only one that saw it- but he was only one of two, the other being Sarang. As two brunette servers walked in with fresh ramen Minho's eyes looked them up and down searching them like hungry animal and he smiled at them. The two ladies blushed and turned quickly after setting the food down. Gaara glanced at Minho and Sarang's hands under the table and seen the female was holding on tightly to her fiance's hand. Just as Gaara looked up Sarang did too and caught him staring. She cleared her throat and looked down uncomfortable and Gaara couldn't help but stare at her. She was so tense.

'_She knows what her 'fiancee' is thinking about.' _Gaara thought to himself. _'So why does she still stay with him?'_

"Um, may I be excused?" Sarang asked suddenly. Everyone turned to look at her. "I need to use the restroom." Temari's lips parted in surprise and she nodded.

"Yeah… go down to the end of the hall and then take a left, it should be the first right on that hall." Sarang nodded and stood with a bow.

"Thank you." She promptly left the room leaving everyone in an uncomfortable silence.

"Is she alright?" Kankuro asked Minho and he nodded.

"Yes, she may just be feeling a bit sick. She can't eat very much." He replied with a smug smile. Gaara stood abruptly almost knocking over the table and went to the door.

"I'm going to go make sure she's okay." He didn't wait for Temari or Kankuro's reply and he certainly didn't wait for Minho's. Gaara made his way quickly down the hall and almost passed Sarang's small figure on the second hall. It wasn't until she turned did he see her, her hair glimmering orange in the light of the setting sun coming in through the window.

"Gaara, why did you leave dinner?" She asked softly.

"I came to make sure you were alright, Minho said you sometimes get sick if you eat too much." Sarang scoffed and looked away.

"Yeah, I'm fine." She looked flawless in the bright colors of the sun and sky, almost like a Goddess. Gaara wanted so badly to feel her affectionate touch on his skin once again as if they were children. Thinking back on it, Gaara realized just how much he depended on her when they were young. She was an emotional crutch and a physical anchor always there to keep him from harming others. If only she'd stayed just a bit longer.

"So, why are you just standing here?" Gaara asked her, sitting on the wide windowsill next to her. Sarang shook her head and huffed.

"It's nothing," She replied before opening her mouth to say something else only to close it once again. "Yeah… it's nothing."

"It's obviously something, but I won't press you to tell me. Just know that I'm here if you need to talk." Gaara could see the faint smile on Sarang's face.

"I know Gaara, you always were and you always will be. I think I'm just stressed."

"About?"

"Just… _life_. People, guys, family, acceptance…" Sarang sighed and shook her head.

"By guys do you mean…?" She nodded.

"Yeah-" Before Sarang could finish her sentence Gaara was interjecting.

"Did he hurt you?" She laughed a bit.

"No… he hasn't hurt me, not at all, but I don't think he's _ready_ for marriage just yet." Gaara completely understood what she meant and he knew she was right. Minho wasn't ready to settle down and be with _one_ person.

"Then why don't you leave him?" Gaara asked.

"What reason do I have to? It's not like he's ever cheated or anything, he's just immature." The look in her eyes told Gaara all he needed to know. Sarang was in denial. She refused to accept the fact that she was just another girl, that she wasn't Minho's one and only and it hurt Gaara, shook him to his core.

"Sarang, you and I both know-" Sarang's eyes were pleading with Gaara for him to not say it.

And so he didn't.

"...Nevermind." Sarang let out a breath she'd been holding and shook her head. She looked out at the night sky and smiled.

"I remember when we were kids and we used to lay down next to each other in alleys and when it got dark we would watch the clouds move across the sky." Gaara nodded and Sarang placed a small hand on the window. Gaara didn't know why it was so tear jerking to look at his old friend's hands and so he took it in his own.

"You're hands are still tiny, like a baby's."

'_I miss this.'_ Gaara thought. _'I miss it so much.'_ Without another thought Gaara laced his fingers with Sarang's but she quickly pulled away from him. Behind her a vase filled with roses fell with a loud crash; roses scattered across the floor and Sarang stared at Gaara with wide eyes.

"Gaara… I don't… I can't-" The sound of footsteps rang clear through the room and both Sarang and Gaara turned to see the crowd they had left in the dining room gathering around them.

"What happened?!" Temari shouted running to the pieces of broken glass on the ground. Gaara's eyes hadn't left Sarang's eyes since the vase had shattered.

"N-Nothing, I almost fell and Gaara… caught my hand, but my foot caught the leg of the stand and the case fell. I'm so sorry, I'll reimburse you in full." Sarang turned sharply after shaking her head and went to help Temari pick up the pieces of the vase. There were telltale signs of distress in the way Sarang moved when she was cleaning. Everything else was a black void with no meaning in that moment until Minho laughed. When Gaara turned he was surprised to see the older male next to his ear.

"I don't know what happened, but I don't want you touching my fiancee." He said patting Gaara's shoulder. Sarang turned and raised an eyebrow at her soon-to-be husband.

"What are you doing?" She asked her hands shaking with pieces of vase in them.

"I was just telling the Kazekage how clumsy you can be." Minho left Gaara's side making sure to bump into the red-haired young man. Sarang smiled nervously.

"Oh, yes, I can be quite… clumsy at times." Minho took Sarang's arm and escorted her to the door.

"Here, let me show you where the trashcan is." When they were out of the room Gaara continued to look out the window at the night sky. How could something so beautiful correlate with something so hurtful in his mind?

"Gaara," Kankuro said. "A little help here would be wonderful." Gaara turned his attention to his siblings who were half bent over and staring at him.

"Are you okay?" Temari asked and Gaara nodded.

"Yes, I just need to go lay down. I'm sorry, tell our guests I don't feel well and to have a good night." He didn't wait for a reply, insteading leaving the room and immediately going to his own chamber. Gaara lit the lamp in the corner of the room and quickly undressed as his emotions began to come out to play. Gaara picked up the nearest item and threw it against the door, it hit the hard surface with a loud '_bang_' and bounced off and onto the floor below. Rage filled Gaara. WHy was Minho the one? Why was _he_ the priority now? Gaara took the covers from his bed and threw them all on the floor not caring if they got dirty, it didn't matter.

_'She promised me we would be together forever, so why? Why did she do this? What does he have that I don't?'_ Gaara threw his clothes aside and ruffled his own hair, stressed. He could feel the blood boiling in his knocked over the nightstand next to his bed letting all it's contents spill out on the floor. One of which was a picture of him and Sarang when they were younger that she'd given him before she left. Gaara wanted to rip it, he was no longer a part of her life, not like he had been. He picked up the picture and stared at it, only then noticing how wrong he was. How different she looked and acted, how she aged every time another woman came in the room. How she flinched whenever Minho moved next to her, whenever he touched her how much pain she was in. Gaara set the picture down on the bed and sat down. _'Why do I care?'_

There was a knock on the door and before Gaara could tell the knocker to come in the door opened. Sarang came in and closed the door behind herself. She looked around the room but didn't say anything, not even when she seen the small picture by Gaara's side.

"Temari said you wished me a good night, but I wanted to come say bye. I don't know if I'll see you again before I leave." Gaara ran a hand through his already messed up hair.

"What happened to 'next time I come I'll stay forever' huh?" Gaara asked.

"...I'm sorry you're angry with me Gaara, but I have duties I need to attend to. Thank you for the food and have a good night." And just like that she left. Gaara looked at the picture one last time, Sarang's then long hair and ageless face. She had hardened so much. _'Or am I just expecting someone else? Am I still expecting the child I was friends with three years ago?'_ Gaara put his head in his hands and rubbed his eyes. _'Or am I just not good enough anymore?'_


	4. Crying Yourself Silly

**A/N:**Before starting this chapter I'd like to say thanks so much for all the followers and favorites! This story is starting off well and it's all thanks to you guys! Also, thank you to my reviewers for complimenting my work and I'm sorry I can't answer your question pokemondemon369 (what an amazing pen name XD), you just have to keep reading. Okay, enough of my rambling, on with the story!~

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><p>(Drowning) In The "Love"<p>

Chapter Four: Crying Yourself Silly

Warning: Some content may not be suitable for young readers.

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><p><em><span>Three Days Later<span>_

Sarang dressed quickly and quietly careful not to wake Minho. She knew how angry he got when she woke him before 11 and she didn't feel like being yelled at. He was already angry with her for talking to Gaara alone while they were eating dinner with Sarang's old friends. She pulled on a yellow dress that went past her feet and touched the floor. It was held up by two straps tied around her neck and then she put on a brown pair of sandals. Since the streets weren't as sandy as she remembered them she was able to wear shoes that were less gody.

Sarang wrote a note on a small piece of paper and taped it to the counter in the kitchen to alert Minho that she was going to go see her parents. Even that made her nervous, what if Minho left to? What if he didn't come back? It had only been a month after the two had gotten engaged that Sarang found him sneaking out of the house each night, more than likely going off to see his secret lover, or maybe it really was his sister like he'd always claimed.

Sarang touched her hand where Gaara had touched her the other night and felt sorry for pulling away. She hadn't meant to hurt his feelings or tear him down, but she couldn't be with him. More than anything it shocked her that Gaara didn't care that she was married, didn't care that she could've been happy with her fiancee. For all Gaara knew Sarang could've been pregnant with Minho's child, but thankfully she wasn't.

'_I know how he feels, and if what I'm feeling is wrong then I can only imagine.'_ Sarang thought to herself as she exited the house. The sun hit her face with the force of a bull and she shook her head. She'd forgotten how hot it was in the Hidden Sand, there was never any rain, the sun was almost always shining, only stopping to take a break at night. It didn't help Sarang to think of her parents. Her burly father and petite, abusive mother. It was never a fun aspect to wake up and see either of them in the living room or the kitchen. Sarang didn't want to see her siblings or her parents or even her cat. _'I just wanted to come see Gaara.'_ But it would've been inappropriate for a married woman to go see another man, especially when she had important things to tend to.

When Sarang got to her parent's door she took a deep breath and prepared to knock. Her knuckles had almost reached the door when it flew open. A small boy attached himself to Sarang's waist and buried his face into her thigh causing her to blush.

"Anego-san!" Sarang's eyes flew open.

"_Anego_?" She whined. "I'm not a delinquent, Kei!" Kei raised his blue eyes and smiled, a mouth with little to no teeth. "Ah, you're teeth are gone huh?" Sarang ruffled her younger brother's hair lovingly and walked in the house she so loathed with him hanging onto her leg. Her mother and father were standing a few feet away from the doorway already with glares marking their faces. Sarang bowed politely. "Hello mother, father." She greeted each and shut the door behind her.

"Sarang." Her mother said coldly. "Kei!" Kei jumped at the sudden raise in his mother's voice. "Get off of her. I'm sure she doesn't want you hanging on her leg after she walked all the way here." That was code for 'I'm going to beat you if you don't get off that troublemaker' and Kei didn't argue. Sarang was sure he knew not to.

"Ho!" Sarang turned at the sudden noise of awe and seen her youngest sister in the hallway. "_Sarang_?" Hama's brown eyes lit up and she charged her sister. Sarang caught the young one in her arms and picked her up, spinning her around. Hama laughed as she spun and Sarang lowered her down. "Nee-san, when did you get here?" She asked.

"A few seconds ago." Sarang laughed and set Hama down, her small feet touched the ground and she was off again. Sarang sighed. _'Exactly the same as before.'_ She thought.

"Aniki, nee-chan! Nee-san's home!" A door opened in the back.

"What?!" Sarang knew Kazehana's voice from anywhere and the one that had yelled was certainly her. "Eh, Sarang? Sarang-chan? It's Sarang-chan, right Hama-tan?"

"Stop calling me Hama-tan! I'm not a kid!" Sarang laughed and smiled as her eldest sister walked into the light in the room. She too had cut her hair short like Sarang, but hers was very generic. Just above the shoulders, hitting the neck, same length all around with a middle part but she made it work because Kazehana made everything work.

"It's good to see you again, Sarang-chan." Kazehana said.

"Hmph," Sarang turned to see Mifune behind her standing with their parents, all three of them giving their child and sibling a disgusted look. "I had imagined you would grow your hair out by now, you're a smart girl, you know the women who lead our clan wear their hair long." Sarang shrugged.

"I guess there's a first for everything, right?" Mifune rolled his eyes and sat down on the couch in the living room.

"Come, let's all take a seat." Sarang's father said. Everyone ventured into the living room after Mifune and their father and mother and sat down in a chair. Sarang and Kazehana sat next to each other on the couch opposite Mifune and their parents while Kei and Hama decided to take a seat on each of their sister's laps. Kei on Sarang and Hama on Kazehana. Sarang's mother looked at her coolly.

"So, is this just a visit or…?" She asked her daughter. Sarang wanted to leave already, she knew she wasn't welcome by the two people whose opinions actually mattered (and Mifune was not one).

"Yes," Sarang replied. "I thought maybe you might be interested to know how things are going back in the Land of Lightning." Sarang's mother rolled her eyes.

"Oh, did you now?" Her husband tapped her leg lightly with a smirk.

"Yumi, don't be like that. Of course, we're interested to know how that old hag is doing. We all know that's what you're talking about, all the accusations that _you_ put her out of commission to take her place." Yumi shook her head and laughed.

"Oh Michiro, don't be like that." Sarang narrowed her eyes at her parents. "You know Sarang-chan-"

"Actually I'll have you both know that grandmother appointed me next leader of the clan herself. She lives in the mansion with me and has her own personal handmaidens as a show of my gratitude and respect. She gets what she needs when she needs it and I attend to the duties I have taken on including those to my fiancee." Whatever rude comment Yumi had on the tip of her tongue dispersed silently into the air as she glared at her daughter.

"_Oh_, I see." She said snarkily.

"I'm also a personal guard for the Raikage when he stays at his office and in town along with some others. I've become a member of the ANBU for the Hidden Cloud and I've studied with all Kage except for two, the Tsuchikage and the Kazekage." Michiro and Yumi both gulped.

"Well, well, haven't you become something? Or are you just trying to prove something to us?" Mifune said. Sarang shook her head.

"With all due respect brother, I could care less about your opinion of me. Or anyone else's to be perfectly honest. I'm not the one still stuck in the Hidden Sand because I couldn't keep my hands off of precious jewels that weren't mine." Yumi sucked in a sharp breath and shook her head.

"What's wrong with you? You know we didn't take those jewels." Michiro said.

"And you know I didn't disable my grandmother to take the spot as head of the clan, but yet I've heard from many that you accuse me of it. What a loyal family." Sarang sighed and gently picked up Kei and set him in her spot on the couch as she stood. "If you need me I'll be with my fiancee in the house near the Kazekage's."

"I'm shocked any decent man could be loyal to someone like you." Mifune said. For some reason his words struck a nerve with Sarang. She knew that all her brother wanted out of her was a reaction, but he wasn't going to get it. Sarang would keep it in as she always did.

"I am too, but look who actually _has_ someone and look at who doesn't. Not too surprising is it?" Before Sarang could say anything else too hurtful she exited the house quickly and sped down the streets. ''

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><p>Gaara had decided to go back and visit the spot Sarang and he had always met at when they were younger. He didn't know why exactly, but he told himself that it was to see if there were any other kids in the village have secret rendezvous with each other. He'd thought there was at least one, but when he got there it wasn't the face he expected.<p>

Sarang sat on the ground, her back pressed against the wall and playing with some loose sand on the ground. She picked it up and let it slide out of her hand before repeating the same steps. She didn't even turn her head to look at Gaara.

"Am I incompetent?" She asked. Gaara was taken aback by her question. How could someone so perfect as someone so flawed if _they_ were the one that was incompetent?

"No!" Gaara said a bit too enthusiastically. "Why would you even ask that?" Gaara took over the instrument in which he held his sand and sat down next to a sullen Sarang and set the gord in his lap. Sarang immediately moved it and laid her own head down in it's place. Gaara ran a cautious hand through Sarang's short hair and admired the cut from the front. Long in the front, short in the back but not too short, it was cute on her. _She_ was cute. She was gorgeous and beautiful and hot and Gaara was beginning to have a hard time controlling himself around her, his childish tendencies to caress her arms and cheeks were coming back.

"Because, no matter _what_ I do my parents seem to hate me. If I became the next Raikage then I guarantee you they would find a reason to be disappointed in me." Gaara continued to lightly stroke Sarang's hair as a sign of affection. The only person he opened up to and wanted to touch, the only one who could make Gaara snap and not out of anger.

"Their opinion doesn't matter. As of right now they don't have much standing in the ninja world anymore, they haven't been in the public eye lately." And Gaara wasn't going to deny he didn't have anything to do with it.

"It's just… when you keep getting put down it starts to get to you. You start thinking that you're really _not_ worth all the time and effort people put into you."

"There's always Minho, right?" Gaara hated to say it, but Sarang's fiancee was almost always with her and it only seemed logical, but Gaara knew somehow an idiot like Minho was going to do something completely screwed up.

"I don't know. The other day, in the hall… I know what you were going to say. I know he's not faithful, I _know_ he's not with just me. I've seen him come home without that ring on, but what can I do about it? He can do what he wants?" Sarang sounded as if she was getting closer and closer to tears and Gaara wanted nothing more than to wrap her in his arms and kiss her cheeks and forehead and eyes and wipe any future tears away.

"Leave him, he's doing all of this because he wants control over the situation. _You_ take control. Leave him."

"But what if I love him?" Everything soft and warm inside Gaara began to grow cold and harden.

"How can you still trust him with something as precious as your heart? How much longer are you going to cry over him?" Gaara asked. Sarang turned her head in Gaara's lap to look up at him with wide blue eyes. "Is it because he has money? _I_ can take you to fancy restaurants and upperclass balls and plays too, Sarang."

"Gaara…"

"I can buy you diamonds rings and necklaces, ones of _importance_, one's that you'll wear forever." Sarang was at a loss for words. She sat up and put her legs on either side of Gaara's and in turn he wrapped his arms around her waist. "I just don't-_can't_- see you hurt anymore. How much longer are you going to cry yourself silly?" Sarang placed her hands on Gaara's cheeks and rubbed her thumb in a circle.

"I don't know what to say anymore." Gaara rubbed Sarang's back with his hand.

"Let go of him, please." Sarang's lips were so close, Gaara could see how moist and soft they looked bathed in the dying sunlight. Her pink lips and wide blue eyes… she was all too transfixing and so close. Before her lips could touch Gaara's she got off of him quick as lightning and covered her mouth looking to the ground.

"I'm sorry Gaara, I just can't. Not while I'm engaged." Before Gaara could call after Sarang she left, her hair blowing in the wind leaving Gaara alone and wilted.


End file.
